Child Support in New Jersey
In this recent episode of New Jersey Divorce Talk Radio, attorneys Robert E. Goldstein, Esq. and Steven P. Monaghan, Esq. discuss what you should know about NJ child support. Listen
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How to Restart Your Life After Your Divorce
By Laura M. D’Orsi, Esq. If you are recently divorced, you may be recovering from the shell shock of what you just went through over the past months or years. The following is a guide to steps that can be taken to restart your life after your divorce. A. Review your divorce agreement and make sure you are in compliance with what is required, make sure that you have received all of the assets you are to receive in the divorce and that the appropriate Qualified Domestic Relations Orders (“QDROs”) are being drafted, that the life insurance is in place and that all deeds have been prepared, car title has been transferred and accounts have been transferred/ closed. B. Have your accountant review your divorce agreement to ensure that you are properly withholding for your taxes, if you are receiving or paying alimony. If you do not withhold taxes and you are receiving alimony, you will have to pay a significant sum on April 15 the year after you receive your first alimony payment. C. Review your expenses and come up with a budget. Make sure that you require all of the regular expenses that you pay. If you require more funds, consider increasing deductibles so that you have more expendable income. Review your cellular phone and home internet/ cable bill, and other bills, and determine if you need all of the services provided. Cut back where appropriate. D. Obtain new health insurance, car insurance and life insurance immediately after your divorce, if you no longer have these types of insurances. E.Meet with a financial planner to review the assets that you own and the liabilities that you have. Be aware of what you have, what you owe and what you are entitled to under your divorce agreement. F. Meet with an attorney and have a new will, Power of Attorney and Living Will prepared on your behalf. G. Review your employment situation. If you are not employed, consider obtaining employment to supplement any alimony/ child support that you might receive. Again, review your divorce agreement to ensure that the fact that you are working will not impact the terms of the agreement. H. Make sure you have changed all beneficiaries for your life insurance, pensions, annuities, accounts, and 401K plans, if you are not required to maintain your former spouse as the beneficiary of these policies/ plans. I. Make sure all of the utility bills are in your own name, and remove your former spouses from the utility bills. Make sure all joint credit cards are closed and remove former spouse from same. You also may want to obtain a credit report to verify that all joint accounts are closed. J. Change passwords for accounts and email accounts, including Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. K. Plan a day out where you can enjoy your new found life. This could be a day at the beach, a spa day or a day in the city or at a ball game.
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10 Tips for Reentering the Workforce after Divorce
Consider the following tips as you attempt to launch your new lifestyle: 1. Do some things that appear unrealistic. As you begin your new life as a single person/mom there will be plenty of opportunities for doing things that are completely realistic. Don’t let others sway your thoughts with negative comments. 2. Think of yourself as a legend. Since you are starting over, this is the perfect opportunity to take your career in a different direction. Nothing says you have to seek the same kind of job you performed before you got divorced. This is a good time to think of all the types of jobs you used to think of doing. 3. Picture yourself as a person who can do it all. If you think as a person who is fearful and cautious, you may find yourself willing to accept the first job offer you have even if it isn’t what you really want. Instead, see yourself as confident and proactive. 4. Look at the big picture and don’t limit your scope when it comes to job opportunities. You may not be offered the position for which you originally applied, but HR may offer you another one. 5. Go after what you want. Imagine yourself as a powerful woman and take aim to achieve what your heart desires. 6. Have a multi-faceted plan for your job search. Don’t limit yourself to just checking listings and sending out resumes. Be creative in your search and don’t leave any stones unturned. 7. Don’t worry needlessly about your resume. While you certainly need a resume, it is probably not the factor that will get you the interview or the job. If you are having a problem and find you can’t move forward because of your resume, set up a profile at Linkedin.com. Even minimal information will help you build a network of contacts. 8. Do not underestimate your technical skills. Even if you don’t feel completely comfortable with computers, don’t overlook a good job. Instead look for cheap or free classes that teach the basic skills. 9. Network as any mother would by using LinkedIn, friends, family, and professional associations. Do whatever you need to do in order to build your courage and contacts. 10. Visualize what you want in your life and where you would like to see yourself in 5-10 years. Hold on to your vision for the future.
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Prenuptial Agreements: Collaborating on a Premarital Agreement Without Destroying The Romance
In this episode, family law attorney Anna–Maria Pittella. Esq., Certified Financial Planner John Caroli and Dr. Karen B. Donahue, PsyD talk about how to collaborate on a premarital agreement without destroying the romance.
Keeping Your Divorce Private
In this day and age of social media it seems the concept of privacy has taken a backseat to complete transparency. People voluntarily put their lives on display as they share nearly every moment on social sites like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. In addition, it has never been easier or been considered as socially acceptable to publicly air images, opinions and even details regarding the personal matters of other people with the world. It is no longer only the lives of the rich and famous that are constantly at risk of becoming objects of public scrutiny. It can happen to anyone at anytime. But there are some matters that simply should remain private and confidential. Divorce is one of them. The traditional litigated divorce process is, by its adversarial nature, not conducive to privacy. This was true long before the rise of social media and is only further complicated by it today. Financial information, sworn statements involving allegations of bad behavior, assets and other private information can become part of the court record and thereby public record. Both personal and professional reputations, extended family relationships and even people’s businesses can be damaged by the fall out of a messy public divorce. While there are a number of ways to keep your divorce private, the collaborative divorce process is an effective option with a number of other benefits as well. Protecting Privacy With Collaborative Divorce Collaborative divorce has become a popular alternative to traditional divorce for families who value their privacy and want to protect their children from the collateral damage that can be done when one’s personal and financial details become public information. In the collaborative process personal information stays within the confines of the divorcing couple and the collaborative team. Negotiation takes place in a safe and private forum. Only the final divorce agreement becomes part of the public court record. Another advantage of keeping divorce out of the court system is that the couple maintains control over the timetable. This can eliminate months of delay waiting on court dates. Less time spent waiting on court dates often leads to a faster resolution and less money spent on legal fees. Divorce is hard enough without having to worry about having the private details of your personal and professional life being made available to the public. If privacy is important to you and your family take the time to learn more about collaborative divorce. Contact Laura D’Orsi today at (732) 741-3121 to schedule a confidential consultation and learn more about your options.
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Passage of Termination of Child Support Law
On January 19, 2016, Governor Christie signed S-1046/A-2721 into law. This law establishes 19 as the age when a child support and/or medical support obligation will end. The new law allows for child and/or medical support to continue up to age 23 for cases in which the dependent is still in high school; attending full-time college, vocational or graduate school; is disabled; if the parties reached a separate agreement; or, if continued support was granted by the court. The effective date of the law is February 1, 2017 and applies to all child support orders. If you have at least one dependent, age 19 or older, as of February 1, 2017, you will receive an initial Notice of Child Support Termination on or around August 1, 2016. This Notice will be sent out 180 days before the dependent’s 19th birthday and will contain information on how to request a continuation of child support as well as how it will impact the amount of child support. For families that currently have a child already over the age of 19, child support will end on February 1, 2017, rather than on the child’s 19th birthday, as the new law is phased in. If your Judgment of Divorce (JOD) or support order specifies an end date other than the dependent’s 19th birthday, that date will stand and you will not be permitted to request an administrative continuation of support. However, you still may receive a Notice of Child Support Termination and be asked to send in a copy of the JOD or order. If no continuation of child support is requested, a second Notice of Child Support Termination will be sent out 90 days before the dependent’s 19th birthday. If no continuation is requested after receiving the second notice, the order of support will end as of the child’s 19th birthday, and both parties will receive an update reflecting this change. (Note that if back child support is owed, the non-custodial parent still is responsible for paying that off.) If you receive an updated order for continued support and wish to oppose it, you may file an application or motion with the court. If there are younger children on the order in addition to the 19-year-old (or older) child(ren), parents may need to file an application or motion with the court to adjust the child support amount. If your JOD or support order calls for child support to continue beyond the dependent’s 19th birthday – if they are in college, for example – you will receive a Final Notice of Child Support Termination 90 days before the dependent’s 23rd birthday (or other extended termination date) informing you that the child support will end. In order to ensure that all notices and informational updates are received, please confirm that the Child Support Program has your most current mailing address, cell phone number and email address. More information regarding the new child support termination process will be posted on www.njchildsupport.org in the upcoming weeks and months.
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High Conflict Couples Litigation Divorce Process vs. Collaborative Divorce Process
In this episode of New Jersey Divorce Talk Radio, Laura M. D’Orsi, Esq. and Dr. Karen B. Donahue, PsyD, a licensed psychologist, discuss high conflict couples in the context of litigated divorce vs. the collaborative process.
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Helping Your Child Cope with Divorce
With the high divorce rate in the 21st century, thousands of children are forced to endure the stress of divorce every year. Some cope better with divorce than others depending on their personalities, ages, and the circumstances that preceded the parents’ separation. The Best Ways to Help Your Child Divorce will affect all children in one way or another with the initial reaction often being one of frustration, anger, worry, sadness, or shock. On the other hand children can emerge from the divorce better able to handle stress and could possibly even become young adults who are quite flexible and tolerant. There are several very important things the parents need to do in order to help the children cope with the events of the divorce such as: Avoiding arguments, visible conflict, and any legal discussions in front of the children Ensure all disruptions to the children’s daily routines are minimal Avoid showing any negativity or assignment of blame in front of the children—discuss those things in private therapy sessions or with friends when you are away from the home Make sure both parents remain involved in the children’s lives Avoid using your children as a support system—they should not be involved in any personal issues with your ex Be Honest with the Children One of the most important things you can do for your children is to be honest with them and let them know about your decision to separate as soon as you make a definite decision. The news won’t be easy to break, but one thing you don’t want to do is allow anger, blame, or guilt to enter into the conversation. Take time to practice telling the children so you can avoid becoming angry or upset. If your children fail to react right away, impress upon them their reaction is fine, and you will talk to them whenever they are willing to open up. Some children believe they will please their parents if they try to deny any feelings of anger or sadness when finding out their parents will no longer be living together. Regardless of the reaction of the children to the separation and divorce, they need you to be honest with them about the changes that will take place in their daily lives. They will depend on you to ease their fears and reassure them they were not to blame.
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The Value Of The Team In Collaborative Divorce
New Jersey family law attorney Anna–Maria Pittella and Dr. William Frankenstein, Ph.D., an independent, licensed psychologist, discuss the value of the collaboratively trained team within the collaborative divorce process.
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Surviving New Jersey Divorce
Divorce is very difficult no matter how unhappy the marriage may have been. Those who are directly involved experience a great many different feelings and may even feel sadness, especially if there are children involved. Sometimes the only way to cope with the associated feelings is by joining a divorce support group. Coping with the Feelings Anyone going through a divorce may experience a variety of different emotions that might include anger, grief, and confusion. In addition to all the overwhelming emotions, there are both legal and financial issues with which they must deal. When you add the additional problems of shared custody, visitation, and child support it can create quite a burden. This is an area in which a divorce support group can be quite invaluable. A divorce support group provides a means of moral support for those who are going through the process of separation and pending divorce. What makes these groups so helpful is everyone who attends the support group is experiencing the same thing and is therefore able to provide moral support as well as practical advice. Sometimes becoming involved with the right group can make the difference between a person struggling without help or having the help necessary for him or her to take control of the entire situation at hand. Finding a Divorce Support Group Anyone who is looking for a support group will find a great many helpful resources. The best divorce support group is one that makes an individual feel comfortable enough to discuss any issues with which that person is uncomfortable without worrying about whether anyone is listening. The best way to find the right group is by attending several different ones before making a final decision. When you attend divorce support groups you can communicate with people who can help you create the best possible situation for your children not just during the divorce but afterward as well. They will help you focus on the interests of your children over both a short-term and long-term period of time. Benefits of a Divorce Support Group Divorce creates a lot of emotions, and many people have a difficult time dealing with and controlling the emotions associated with the process. Divorce support groups will help you set goals that will be beneficial to the children and help you learn to focus on their interests and needs instead of on your emotions and all the things that irritate you about your ex. Everyone in the support group will initially be strangers to you. It may be difficult to enter into a group that consists of members who already know each other, so you may want to choose a start up group instead of an existing one. You may also want to decide whether you want to sit in on a group with only one gender or both. Some people may not feel comfortable in a mixed group. There are several benefits of attending a divorce support group that include: Ability to discuss your emotions and situation with people who are in a similar situation Shows you how others are handling their children and will provide you with ideas and solutions you might find useful when it comes to dealing with daily problems with your children Support groups can help you learn how to ease the disappointment your family members may feel regarding your divorce Sharing your emotions will help you feel appreciated for your courage Support group members will help you understand the financial challenges divorce will present and help you learn how to handle them You will learn about your rights in the state where you live Group members will drill you about the importance of not signing any papers before consulting with a divorce lawyer You will receive encouragement in the process of building new relationships Don’t wait to become involved in a divorce support group. You should begin looking as soon as you and your spouse make the decision to end your marriage. How to Find Divorce Support Groups No matter where you live there are likely to be thousands of divorce support groups in your area. It’s easy enough to find one that meets your needs by talking to friends who have been divorced and visited a divorce support group. Talking to someone who is familiar with one of these groups is the easiest way to find one that meets your needs and makes you feel comfortable. If you don’t have any friends who are divorced—or at least none who have felt the need to join a divorce support group—there are other resources you can use such as: Searching the internet Conducting a search under various government agencies and community services organizations Obtain a recommendation from your attorney Seek a referral from either your church or a social worker Getting through a divorce is a very heartbreaking and painful experience, but finding a compassionate and helpful divorce support group can make the process easier and more bearable. This begins with learning how to choose the support group that makes you feel comfortable and meets your individual needs.
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